Who’s Left on the Island?

September 22, 2010 at 12:53 pm 2 comments

Not having cable during September (aka New TV Time!) is pretty much my nightmare scenario. One I am currently living in. Beyond the initial questions of “What the hell was I thinking?” and  declarations of “well, its 9:30 so I GUESS I’LL GO TO BED WTF”, I’m going to make a sincerely shocking statement to anyone who’s ever spent more than five minutes with me:

It actually might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to me (TV-wise).

Before you start hyperventilating (Beal), let me qualify this statement- I am not nor shall I ever be one of those people who can live without a television, television shows, television-based products, television accessories and television devices. I’m sure that at the end of my life, I will be in my death bed wrapped in a Snuggie, watching the flat screen I dragged into the hospital room, clutching TiVo with my cold, dying hands. Just so we’re clear.

But. Having a very, very limited window (aka lunch at the office on the Interweb) to watch shows that I Cannot Live Without has led to some pretty shocking revelations, at least to me. (This is the most fascinating blog post of all time.) Shows that I thought I loved? Turns out I can live without them- some of them I even dread watching (DREAD). New shows that I was excited to see this fall? Meh. Other dark horses have emerged.

In case you were wondering, here is the Cliff Notes of my eye-opening months without cable (IT FEELS LIKE IT’S BEEN FOREVER):

USA- Let’s all be spies or detectives!

Burn Notice: I have not watched Burn Notice once since my TV went dark. I don’t even know how this season ended. At one point, I went to the Hulu page and sighed, “Every single episode is basically the same.” I might as well have poisoned the damn thing.

Covert Affairs: Conversely (and this MIGHT be because it’s new or simply the different serialized structure), haven’t missed an episode. Yes, clearly, I’m just waiting for Piper Perabo to make a reference to dancing on a bar in her wilder youth. But no kidding, this show is good. I’ve even stopped laughing at the stupid intro montage. And HotHinder! From Heroes!

AMC- Our Shit Seriously Doesn’t Stink. We Know Because We Just Pooped in Your Hands And You Are Wearing It Like a Gold Bracelet.

Mad Men:  I have always kind of dreaded watching Mad Men. I don’t have the stomach for Intense Shows Where 99% of the Characters Are Intense And Miserable And No One You Would Ever Want to Meet in Real Life (see critically acclaimed series such as The Wire, Sopranos, Breaking Bad). But Mad Men is so pretty! And my Google Reader hearts it SO, SO MUCH. Still, weeks without a new episode? It’s like I’ve had a month of substitute teachers who totally fell for the old “our teacher doesn’t believe in homework” story. I might still watch it- on mute. (Also, I crack up whenever they do “Sneak Previews.” They are ridiculous- nothing but split second shots of random characters saying random things- what is the point of them? We get it, Weiner. You won’t REVEAL anything. At least spare us the shot of Betty eating an apple and saying, “I told you not to talk to him like that!” Who is she talking to? What room is she in? I don’t even care.)(Second aside, seriously, Weiner- I know you’re not hurting for ratings and awards but do not discount the beauty of a sneak preview. I still remember the sneak preview for Dawson’s Creek when Joey and Pacey were going to do it! On the ski trip! omg! There were screams up and down my dorm hall. Just saying. It was magic. They’re like TRAILERS, itty bitty trailers. Have you ever met anyone who wanted to go to the movies and SKIP the previews? No. That person is awful and does not exist.)


Glee: Glee kind of inspired this post altogether. Ten minutes ago, I wandered over to Hulu and thought about watching last night’s episode. And I just- I couldn’t do it. I’ve been feeling cranky about the show’s Constant Publicity over the summer. This is another series that Google Reader is obsessed with, to the point that seeing the name makes me feel like a spider has dropped on to my neck. There is also the sensation that Glee (which already was so fundamentally flawed in execution last season and still so revered) is going to suffer this season and beyond- the allure of what made the show so different and fun is now familiar. And if the writing wasn’t strong then, what are the odds that it’ll be stronger now? I don’t think I can bear to watch something that I know in my gut could be so much better.

Shows I Still Cannot WAIT To See:

Parks and Recreation

Cougar Town (for anyone who has an Urban Family, you need to see it. Don’t let the title mislead you- they know it’s awful and we’re stuck with it.)


Outsourced (just kidding! Ha ha ha)

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia


Entry filed under: TV.

Grown Up I’m an idiot.

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. I’m an idiot. « Tasty is British For  |  September 24, 2010 at 1:22 pm

    […] the locker room. I stopped. On the television screens that are literally everywhere in the gym, Community was starting. I still don’t have television at home. Community was starting. I could watch […]

  • 2. Beal  |  October 19, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    Judi. I too have tamed the beast that was my addiction to television. You have not been judged. Fine. I still don’t miss anything on Showtime.

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About This Lady

I am a writer who has lived in DC, Los Angeles and Chicago. In the morning, I write novels. During the day, I write ads, brochures, websites and blogs. At night, I don't do any writing because that's too much writing.

Trying to be Auntie Mame but right now I feel more like Liz Lemon in execution. It's a process, people.

I have a food/fiction blog called Some Kitchen Stories.


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